This morning, I had an appt. with my pain clinic up here. After the meeting, I was sitting in the lobby, waiting for a perscription to be written. I was sitting in a chair, leaning on my cane handle.

The door opens, and someone comes in. I cannot see the person's face. They are bent 90 degrees at the waist. They are also twisted about 45 degrees to the right, so the left hip is sticking up, and is really the tallest point of the person. They are using a telescoping cane, that clicks loudly with each step as the adjustable button slops around. They also have their right hand bound in an ace bandage.

The woman behind the desk says, "Hi Lisa". Lisa responds "Hello!" She asks if there is something she needs to fill out ... and the desk lady says that she will bring it out to Lisa.

Lisa moves across the room, away from me. I'd estimate, from her legs, that she might weigh 85 pounds. I've only seen one other person so twisted and bent. "Lew" is the husband of one of Kelly's girlhood friends. He's another story.

Well, Lisa sat down across the room, and looked up. Now I saw her face for the first time. She looked to be maybe 165 - give or take. She looked at me - noted me leaning on my cane ... and said "I know how you feel". Very compasionately. I said, "I'm sure you do, I'm sorry you are having such trouble." We began to talk. I moved over near her. It would be hard to reproduce the conversation, in proper order; but over ten minutes, I learned ... she was 47. Five years ago, she'd been perfectly normal. Less than a year ago, her husband had contracted liver issues, and died very quickly. It had been determined that Lisa had a "weak spine" ... and so some Dr. had fused her entire upper spine. She was not all bent over then. She says that later, it was determined that her REAL problem is in her pelvis. In her words she said, "So they did the WRONG operation". She says that another Dr. now wants to operate on the pelvis ... but she's worried ... because he is the mentor of the guy that fused her back. She can't see why the first guy did that, if the second guy now has another vision of the whole thing.

Lisa says that she'd found a place in Texas that works only with people with scoliosis. I sincerely hope they can help her. As we talked, she said that "people just do not understand people in pain". She said she'd looked at me, and saw the pain in my eyes. She said that people don't understand why you don't just "get over it". I agreed. I said, yes ... and they just "go away". And, she immediately agreed. She recounted how everybody was all willing to help, but never seemed to be available. We talked for awhile. And, she said that SHE would pray for ME. Then they came to take her back to the rooms.

Oh ... "Lew". He's bent at the waist. Has implanted morphine pump, and falls asleep while you are talking to him. He dropped a cup of coffee on the floor, and went to sleep once while we were talking. Failed back surgery. Then ... corrective back surgeries ... many of them. And unGodly pain.

So; once again ... I've been reminded of why I take pills and stay away from the knife for the lower back. I just have to try to explain, over and over, to the people who look at me ... my cane ... and get this look on their face like ... "GOOD LORD MAN ... IT'S 2011 !!!" They say as much too.

The Doc decided to change my meds this am, since I've been in agony for weeks. Well, I won't tell you the personal details. Other than the fact that I went to pick it up and it was .... after the discount ... it was $400.30 for a month. I had to leave it there. I had to go back to the Doc and get a substandard alternative. Good enough for me.

Working on my bluing room tanks.

Anyway. Say a prayer for Lisa.

God Bless,
Gary

its so wrong to have to pay for medication at all , thoughts are with you both.